there's a picture-perfect, 4-foot-with-a-16-second-interval swell hitting the coast, and i have no way to get down there with my trusty board, the white pearl:
rain, sleet, and snow couldn't stop me last year; but now a simple lack of transportation is enough to keep me from the beach. i spent the last five minutes watching beautiful, glassy, perfectly formed chest-high waves rolling on the higgins beach webcam, then realized i was drooling on my keyboard
(not a good idea)
but it's ok. i can wait a little longer for the stars to align so i can get back down to the beach. it's just killing me to be so close, but so far
other than that, life is good. there was an amazing prayer in the bulletin at church this morning which i wrote down in my notebook. i'm forever making notes in the bulletin, then forgetting all about them and tossing the whole bundle into the trash. but this was good enough to warrant copying down to ensure it's preservation in my personal records. here it is:
Lord, I do not know what to ask of you.
Only you know what I need.
You love me better than I know how to love myself.
Father, give to your child that which he himself knows not how to ask.
Strike or heal, depress me or raise me up:
I adore all your purposes without knowing them.
I am silent;
I offer myself up in sacrifice;
I yield myself to you;
I would have no other desire than to accomplish your will.
Teach me to pray.
Pray in me.
Amen
Only you know what I need.
You love me better than I know how to love myself.
Father, give to your child that which he himself knows not how to ask.
Strike or heal, depress me or raise me up:
I adore all your purposes without knowing them.
I am silent;
I offer myself up in sacrifice;
I yield myself to you;
I would have no other desire than to accomplish your will.
Teach me to pray.
Pray in me.
Amen
(Francois Fenelon, 1651-1715)
that's a tough prayer. not sure i'll ever be able to say it and completely mean it, but that's where i want to be
i moved the last of my stuff out of my parents garage where i'd been storing a few random things (bike, surfboard, sled, hatchet, spider-man towel), and did some grocery shopping this afternoon. normally i try and avoid most commercial activities on a sunday, but this was one of those times when i needed more food than i could carry, and had access to a vehicle (thanks to my mom). so i loaded up with groceries, hopefully enough to last me for a couple weeks, dropped my stuff off, and then returned the van and biked back home. now i'm getting ready to spend the rest of the evening chillaxing, cooking some supper and doing some reading before i head to bed
(i didn't get a nap today... hence the title of the post)
i just realized, this could quite possibly have been the most boring-est post ever. i'll end the agony by ceasing to type and starting to stir-fry
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